Archive for August, 2010

75+ Blow Off Quotes You Don’t Want To Hear

Whether you have been the person initiating the break up or the person on the receiving end, no doubt you have heard some real doozies throughout the course of your dating life.  I know I have and each time it happens I just add one more to my collection of “did she really say that?”.  You will probably be surprised by some of these and you may have actually heard them before but just not picked up on what you were being told (or maybe you played dumb).  Either way here are 75 blow off quotes that you most certainly don’t want to hear:

Blow off lines:

“I talked to God about it, and He said that you weren’t right for me.”

“I like you, but not in *that* way”

You ask for their number and get back “XXX-867-5309”.  Think about it…

“I thought about it and because you are Jewish it means you are going to burn in hell for all of eternity and I just don’t think I can deal with that”

“We need to talk”

“Sorry, I’m more into the kind of guys who are, you know, into girls.”

“Let’s don’t, but say we did..”

“I don’t know why you think we’re gonna go together cause we never will”

“You know what this is; let’s not make this any harder than it has to be…”

“I know you’ve always been there for me and you would make any girl happy, but I wanna see other people”

“Sorry, but I’m married”

“Lose my number.”

“You’re such a great person; you need to be with someone who can give you the attention you deserve.”

“I got engaged last month. I know I should’ve told you that earlier.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you this sooner, but I’ve been in a relationship for the past 3 and half years.”

“I’m sorry but Tuesday is the only night I can get my windshield tinted.”

From a girl, “you helped me decide that I like other girls”

“Welcome to Dumpsville! Population: You!”

“You’re TOO nice…”.

“I love you, but I’m not in love with you.”

“I’m in a weird place right now.”

“I need space.”

“Right now, I’m just not able to give you the intimacy that you’re looking for and that you deserve”

“Haven’t I seen you somewhere before” and they reply “yes, that’s why I don’t go there anymore”

“I’d rather gargle with glass than have sex with you, besides you look too much like my sister and I don’t even have one!”

“My mom won’t let me go out with you”

“I can’t go to lunch I have to take a nap”

“I would rather be gang raped behind a back alley of an AIDS clinic than ever be touched by you again.”

“I wouldn’t want to lose our friendship”

“I wouldn’t want your hand to get jealous”

“I’ve gotta go do a thing”

“I wish you nothing but the best!”

“Get Lost, Now”

“It’s not that we couldn’t work well together, it’s that I couldn’t stand looking at you in bed without being drunk”

“I’d love to go out with you, but, I’m scheduled for a Karma transplant tonight”

“If I throw you a bone…will you promise to leave”

“I’m not into dating at this point”

“I just threw up a bit in my mouth”

“Contact me again and I’m getting my lawyer involved”

“As long as I’m able to still feed myself, I’ll never go out with you”

“You are as ugly as sin”

“I’m sorry but I’m gay”

“You’re not my type”

“I just want to be friends”

“I’ve already lowered my standards, but not low enough to date you”

“Sorry I’ve decided to stay with my boyfriend”

“Go @#% yourself”

“You‘re a loser and you have body odor”

“Good luck on your search”

“I’m not willing to date someone that lives more than 10 miles away”

“It’s not you, it’s me”

“It’s not me, it’s you”

“You’re just not the right one for me”

“I found someone else that knows how to appreciate me”

“I need more from a relationship”

“I accidentally slept with someone else”


Other ways to know:

If they keep calling you the wrong name, even after you correct them.

If you ask a girl what time it is and she tells you she’s not allowed to talk to guys.

When you ask for their number, they say sure and start with 999…NEVERMIND and then takes off.

If you see them out on a date with someone else.

If at the end of a phone conversation, you ask to see them again, and they say they have to check their schedule and get back to you.

If your rain check on your date keeps getting extended.

When you see them online but never hear from them.

If they do show up for a date but then turn around and walk out.

If they don’t show up for a date.

When they file a restraining order on you.

While at dinner your date goes to the restroom, but then sits down at another table with someone else.

When at dinner, your date keeps flirting with the person at the next table.

When someone says “Check Please” but you are not at a restaurant.

If you call the number you just got and get the joke hotline.

If they don’t call you back.

When you ask them out and they say “I have something to do, I’m not sure what but I know I have something”.

When you ask them out and they just start laughing.

When asking them out, they ask if you want to borrow their glasses.  When you ask why, they say so you can see that I’m not in your league.

If on your date they keep talking on the phone to other people.

You get butt dialed and they are making out with someone else.

You accidentally get a text from them about where they are meeting you later (and they are currently with you).

10 Worst Ways to End a Relationship

Face it — there’s no easy way to tell someone you’ve been dating for two months or two years that it’s time to break up. But, there is definitely a right and wrong way to cut ties with your significant other that doesn’t involve texts, e-mails or avoidance. Whether you are uncomfortable with confrontation or afraid of their reaction, delaying the inevitable will only make matters worse. So, before you start writing a “Dear John” letter or planning a breakup at your favorite restaurant, consider the other person’s feelings, do it in person and let them down gently. Here are the 10 worst ways to end a relationship:

  1. Dear John Letter“Dear John” letters have long been used to end relationships that were strained by distance, war and infidelity. Today’s relationships are still torn by these factors, but “Dear John” letters have not gotten any less painful or heartbreaking to read. Although it may be hard to break up in person and it sounds kinder in letter-form, “Dear John” letters are a miserable thing to receive and should be avoided at all costs.
  2. Text MessageImagine hearing the bzzt, bzzt, bzzt of your cell phone and seeing a text message that says, “I think we should just be friends. I’m sry,” or “It’s not u, it’s me.” This is how low text message breakups look and sound. No matter what you say or how you word it, the fact remains that sending a text message is a pathetic, inconsiderate way to dump someone. It only fuels a text message battle of mean-hearted messages that get you nowhere and rack up your phone bill. Just don’t do it.
  3. Over the PhoneDumping someone over the phone might keep you safe from embarrassing public arguments and
    getting slapped, but expect to have your ear chewed off and hear about what a coward you are. Breaking up with your significant other over the phone or on their voicemail is not a suitable way to end a relationship, and only makes you look like a wimp because you didn’t do it in person.
  4. E-mailE-mail breakups are today’s version of “Dear John” letters, but worse. No matter where you are or who you are with, opening up that unexpected e-mail and reading it back and forth in silence is one of the worst feelings. Chances are, you’ll read the e-mail when you’re at work, school or in the middle of something really important, and the only rebuttal you have time for is a series of expletives. E-mail breakups leave little room for discussion and, once again, make you look cruel and cowardly.
  5. Facebook/Twitter/MySpaceInstead of screaming it from the rooftops, people nowadays profess their love on Facebook, Twitter, MySpace and other social media sites so the whole world can see. Unfortunately, when that relationship crumbles the whole world sees that you’re suddenly single and were dumped through newsfeeds, wall posts and tweets. Breaking up with someone on a social media site is disastrous because it is seen by hundreds of people, which is not only mortifying but makes you look like a huge jerk or jerkette.
  6. Word of MouthLike a game of telephone, word-of-mouth breakups move through a group of people, get twisted and reworded and you end up being the last one to know. This usually happens within a group of friends, who either assumed you already knew or like to gossip. It doesn’t matter if one comment turned into a rumored breakup, or if you intended for it to get back to him/her, breakups are a private affair and the dumpee deserves to hear it first from you.
  7. Under the InfluenceSome people need liquid courage to break things off with someone, but end up losing their pride and then some during the process. Being under the influence when you end a relationship not only shows disrespect, but you may say things you don’t actually mean and end up losing a potential friend. So, skip the bubbly and face him/her soberly.
  8. In PublicDon’t take you soon-to-be ex to a restaurant or baseball game to tell them you want to end things. Nothing but bad things will happen during this unexpected public break up, like yelling, crying and possibly drinks thrown in your face. Instead, pick a quiet, private place, like your house or a park, to let them down gently.
  9. Disappear and AvoidDon’t go MIA on your boyfriend or girlfriend to avoid the inevitable. No one likes to be avoided or ignored, especially when they might think something bad happened to you, and putting off the breakup until they show up at your door is down-right disrespectful and cowardly. Disappearing or avoiding them will only make the breakup that much harder, by putting a bad taste in their mouth and making it difficult to stay friends.
  10. Have Someone Else Do ItWhether they hear it from a mutual friend or a singing telegram, having someone else tell your significant other that “it’s over,” is one of the most spineless, sad ways to end a relationship. Not only are you putting your friend or a complete stranger in a terribly awkward position, but you are saying that you don’t care about your girlfriend or boyfriend enough to do it yourself. Man or lady-up and don’t have someone else break the bad news for you.